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November 04 Finding Love, Knowing LoveThroughout my lifetime, I knew many kinds of love. Love of a mother for her sons, love of a grandmother for her grandchildren, love of a woman to a man, true love however, short the time together was. I have also known love that was not true, love that was pity, love that was false, and love that was full of insecurity. I have never had the fortune of being with someone I truly loved for the rest of my life. I have never really loved myself, until tragedy happened. In my quest for love I was always searching for love that will never be mine. Why? Because I didn't know that to be truly loved you must also love yourself. I was so deperate to have someone to 'love' me that I missed the real opportunity. Instead, I accepted 'false' love to be true love, to be my 'soulmate'. My quest for love made me the perfect victim of con men, who play with women's hearts. I also have learned that love real love does not back up that action with fists, or manipulation, or controlling a person. Love isn't changing someone to be someone they want them to be. Love is unconditional. Love loves someone just the way they are. Fat, thin, short, tall, ugly, pretty, dull, carefree. Love loves you just the way you are. It is hard to find someone who makes your heart sing, who is aligned with the way you are someone who accepts you exactly the way you are. The important thing is first, you have to love yourself, and be comfortable with who you are. I am not a perfect person, and too many years I have allowed others to make me into what they wanted me to be. I am me, not perfect, I don't say my words are perfect, I am insecure sometimes, passionate at times, goofy at times, short, nearsighted, deaf, but can hear, kind, a mother, a daughter, a grandmother. I am a writer, a teacher, a poet, a woman. Who is perfect at being imperfect. I have dreams, and hopes, and wish happiness on everyone. It isn't a perfect world, but with love it is. Love youself first, and you can make good choices most of the time. Good Luck, don't allow yourself to want love so much that you become a victim like I did. Victims that comment on the blogI want to make a comment on comments on the blogs. I do not remove any comments from victims of con men, and if they show proof that they are the victims, I leave their comments on the blog. I do not do this to cause harm to anyone, but to allow victims to have a voice. We have free speech, and as long as it is not an outright lie, then I will leave the comment on the blog. I have removed others, and until I have proof that those that have commented are in fact lying about their experiences, the comments stand. Too many times victims have been revictimized over and over again by their predators. I am sorry, but I just want the victims to be able to voice their experiences and if that hurts someone's feelings, I am sorry. Don't put yourself in a position to where you can be a predator or a victim. I know that is not easy to do, because predators are just that predators, They prey on the innocent, and make them out to be not innocent, but the one that hurt them. If you care to comment online about a predator that hurt you have the proof to back it up. Good luck to all the victims out there, and to the predators: SHAME ON YOU! |
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